Do you know what the best part of the Christmas season is? It is being together with members of our family.
Do you know what the worst part is? It is being together with members of our family.
It would be funny if it weren’t true. Right?
The stress of being with family at Christmas
We know that the Christmas season is family time but sometimes there is a lot of stress when it comes with being with family. It seems that all the imperfections of our family all of a sudden become difficult to digest.
In fact, because of past mistakes in our relationships, the relationships may be more known for anger, heartache and confusion rather than peace and good will.
This can make for some very difficult and hurtful situations if we are not careful.
An example from my life
After a couple of years of being married, Lauren and I spent Christmas with my entire family. All my siblings (and their significant others and kids) came together at my parent’s house. It was a full house to say the least.
One of things that my family enjoys doing together is playing games. The problem is though, we are all very competitive. The long and the short of it is, we started playing a game called Poleconomy and it got ugly very fast.
Feelings were hurt.
Relationships were strained.
And it was all over a silly board game.
We can all laugh about it now but it was no laughing matter at the time.
There is a touch of irony in that, isn’t there? Isn’t it amazing that we show the least amount of tolerance and patience during a time that is to be distinguished by peace?
It doesn’t have to be this way though!
2 ways to make being with family this Christmas less stressful
Over the next two posts I want to share two ways to make being with family this Christmas less stressful. I am not guaranteeing no stress but I do believe these two things will help lessen the stress.
1. We need to remember that Christmas is a time to BE family.
2. We need to seek for ways to demonstrate our love for each other (I am going to share 15 simple ways we can do this).
How have you experienced the stress of being with family at Christmas?
A Few Related Posts You May Find Useful:
Sermon Synopsis 12/16 – When Christmas isn’t all it’s cracked up to be
Sermon Synopsis 12/21 – Making the most of Christmas Opportunities
Kill your stress before it kills you!
What are your Christmas traditions?
Seek a fresh touch from God this Christmas
3 ways to manage stress
5 tips to avoid overspending this Christmas
3 ways to give the gift of presence to your children this Christmas
Thanks for this post sir. I read all your posts via my RSS feed reader, but felt that a “thank you” was warranted for sure on this one.
Merry Christmas!
Thanks for taking the time share a comment Dave!
What? Stress being with family at Christmas? No! Never! We all get along just fine all the time. You know…kind of like a nestful of newly hatched birds when when their mother arrives with a nice juicy wiggly worm. (Sarcasm should be evident.) I look forward to your next posts.
You’re family sounds like mine Julie!
Thanks for sharing.
Hi Kevin! Yes this can be a very stressful situation to say the least. I had hosted Christmas for the past several years. My situation is that we have a blended family. We all get along together, but the kids live all over the U.S. So, this means a 5 day holiday for me to host.
Yes, 4 adult children, with their kids, 2 exes and my husband and I. All so we can be together. Things go pretty well, but I do all the cooking. One sibling says to another “why aren’t you helping?” Ah…it begins! One ex fights for attention! Phew!
Now that the kids are all on their own, I put a stop to it all. Yes they did take a hissy fit because they love coming to my home, but they worked it out. We stood firm and visit each one during the month to spend quality time.
As for Christmas Day? Being a Roman Catholic, we have midnight mass. That is a gift enough for me. We have played it down and go out for brunch or dinner. Alas Peace!
Donna
Sometimes we put so much pressure on ourselves and others to get everyone together for Christmas but it is not always the best thing. That’s great that your family has found a “system” that works.
Thanks for sharing Donna!
Oh yes, sounds all too familiar. I established years ago that 4 days is the absolute maximum I can be in the same close proximity with my family. That first day is awesome, then things start going south. Still, wouldn’t pass up the opportunity.
Spending time with family is indeed a gift that sometimes needs to be received in small doses.
Thanks for sharing Marquita!
There is very little stress when my family gets together at Christmas. The main reason for this is the lack of time that we see each other throughout the rest of the year. Christmas is great family is great family time for us. Stress free
That is awesome Adam! That isn’t always the case but when it is it is indeed a blessing.
Thanks for sharing.
Thank you Kevin for this post; I would also like to thank every one who commented and shared a brief story of their situation. I was blessed in one manner; that there wasn’t any detectable stress at our Christmas gatherings when we had them.
It is a bit sad that there is stress associated with a holiday that is supposed to be so sacred but I will say that in many cases; including mine that perception plays a big role in the level of stress around the holidays – I won’t try to explain my holiday stress as it would take a whole chapter taken from my non-fiction novel that I am writing to make it understandable (lol).
I again thank you Keven for sharing your post.
I agree with you Michael that it is sad that Christmas is associated with stress instead of peace (as it is supposed to be). You are absolutely right about perception too. A lot of times we live our self-fulfilling prophecies about our Christmas gatherings. Choosing to go through the Christmas season with a different attitude is a must.
Thanks for sharing!
Several years ago, all of my dad’s side of the family traveled a couple hours to have Christmas at a cousin’s house. Everyone was planning on staying overnight. We ended up playing the Battle of the Sexes board game, and one of my cousin’s got so angry that he decided it was time for him and his family to leave. I can’t remember what exactly the disagreement was about, but it seemed to blow over quickly even though it put a damper on the evening!
Games can definitely bring out the worst in us if we are not careful.
Thanks for sharing Kirra!