I have been a pastor now for almost 15 years. In my years of being a pastor I have had some incredible joyous times and I have had some incredibly difficult times. I have had moments where I thought I could “conquer” the world and I have had moments of feeling great defeat and disappointment. I have had moments where I couldn’t imagine doing anything else and I have had moments wondering if I should continue on as a pastor.
Most Christians turn to their pastor in their difficult moments, in their moments of defeat and disappointment and in their moments of doubt. But who does the pastor turn to when they are experiencing these feelings? In most cases, they turn to two sources: God and their spouse. The God part is a no-brainer but I wonder how many married pastors recognize the importance of their relationship with their spouse? I wonder how many churches recognize the ministry of their pastor’s spouse to their pastor?
Lauren has been a great support to me.
Lauren has been an incredible encourager to me.
Lauren has been my shoulder to “cry” on when I am feeling down and defeated.
Lauren has been my sounding board when it has come to making tough decisions.
Lauren has been the one who has given me “pastoral care” when I needed it the most.
Sadly, I know I can take all these incredible blessings for granted at times. I can forget that Lauren is carrying a “load” that most wife’s don’t have to. I think most churches can fall into this trap too.
So here’s my two-fold challenge:
Pastor’s: Don’t take your spouse’s ministry to you for granted! Nurture your relationship with them. Make sure that their needs are being met too. Pray for them. Go out of your way to do something special for them this week! Take the time today to tell them that you appreciate them!
Churches: Don’t take your pastor’s spouse for granted! Support them. Encourage them. Pray for them. Remember that they are carrying a load that most spouses don’t have too. Don’t put unfair expectations on them. Do something special for them this week!
October was pastor’s appreciation month. Maybe November should be pastor’s spouse appreciation month!
If you are a pastor, what do you do to not take your spouse for granted? If you are not a pastor, what do you do to not take your pastor’s spouse for granted?
Recommended reading: Leading on Empty: Refilling Your Tank and Renewing Your Passion